Dear Holly
The 7th May saw you turn 4. We had a big party for you on Sunday with all your friends from nursery. We had a disco and girl you were putting some moves down on that dance floor! For your actual birthday we spent the day at Chester Zoo. The whole birthday weekend has been totally fantastic if not a little hectic. But, amongst all the chaos and people coming and going, you and your borther were amazing. You never complained and there were no tantrums and you took it all in your stride. You were the centre of attention and you handled it very well.
You loved the Zoo and just spend the whole time running around from animal to animal while we tried to keep up. We ate too much, spent too much and overdosed on Ice Cream but it was so worth it.
I remember the day you were born like it was yesterday. You were overdue by 12 days but when you decided to come there was no stopping you and it only took me 5 hours to have you, naturally. I remember how I couldn't stop sniffing your hair (you were born with rather a lot) as I held you in my arms and I remember how it took you hours to have your first cry. I remember how you scared the crap out of me by going as limp as a rag doll while feedging from me. I buzzed the nurse in tears that I couldn't get you to move and it turned out you had just fallen asleep and came off the breast. I started worrying about you so early on and it hasn't stopped.
I remember all the visitors and proud family that came to see you as soon as you were born and I remember how proud I was showing you off. I wouldn't let many people hold you and it took me a while to let go.
I remember falling head over heels in love at 8.36pm on Thursday 7th May and knowing that I would give my life for the beautiful girl that was staring at me with the biggest, most wonderful eyes in the world. I felt a love for you that made my heart burst and my head spin. My life changed for the better that day and I have spent everyday since thanking God for the blessing that is my Holly.
I was tucking you into bed last night and we lay there chatting (as we often do as part of our bedtime routine) and I said to you, "well i'll have to stop calling you baby girl now you're 4" and you put your arm around me and said, "i'll always be your baby mummy". I fell even more in love with you for saying that and my heart burst with pride.
The past four years have gone by far too quickly and I'm often afraid I won't remember all the little details about you but at least I know I remember all the important ones. I am so proud to have shared your journey with you so far and I can't wait to join you on the rest of it. I promise you I will be by your side in what ever you do and there is only ever 1 person there for you it will be me! You make me so proud to be your mummy and I hope I never let you down (other than in the ways parents are supposed to fail their children).
Happy birthday my precious baby girl.
Love you now and always.
Mummy